Tag: christianity

Between the Sheets

HOT HOT HOT

A Book Review of Sheet Music by Kevin Leman

I’ve read many books on marriage over the years. I’ve also read quite a few on the subject of sexual intimacy within marriage. They have ranged from clinical (just the facts) to almost comical (quite humorous in over the top ways). In my opinion, this book deftly includes everything one needs to know (and should learn/read) when it comes to the sexual relationship in marriage. The author can be humorous without being graphic. He is frank without being foul.

All too often in Christian circles, the sexual relationship is not given the attention it should be given. I’m not certain the reason for this (although I have some opinions). While the worldling knows way more than it should know about the sexual relationship between men & women, all too often the Christian shys away from it. Why do we do this? Every Christian I know believes that sex has been authored by God. Every Christian I know believes that sex is a gift from God. However, in many cases, marriages are hindered or are dying due to a lack of knowledge/learning when it comes to the sexual relationship in marriage.

Leman threads the needle when it comes to this “hot” topic (it can be hot or cold depending on your marriage!). Although he gets quite specific (some readers may blush or get uncomfortable reading his book) about all things sexual within a marriage, in the first chapter, he lays some very important foundational truths about what is to come later in the book. For instance, he says this on page 10:

“While we’ll talk about the physical side of sex, my specialty is with what goes on in your brain and in your relationship. That’s where most marriages need to be healed first. Besides, the physical aspect will usually take care of itself if the relationship is healthy.”

Later on the same page he says this:

“A couple’s sex life is usually a microcosm of the marriage…most often, if the marriage is on the rocks, sex will follow it to the bottom.”

I agree wholeheartedly with Leman. In the counsels I have counseled over the years, I have seen this truth over and over and over again. A good, healthy marriage will beget, a good, healthy sex life. In matter of fact, I would suggest that one CANNOT have a good, healthy marriage without a good, healthy sex life and vice-versa.

Near the end of chapter one, the author makes this poignant statement and one each marriage couple needs to heed:

“One of the most loving and holy things you can do in marriage is to provide a sexually fulfilling pursuit of your husband or wife.” p. 17

Excellent, excellent material throughout the book. Chapter two contains POWERFUL truths that I rarely read in a book about this topic. It is entitled, “A Crowded Bed.” In the chapter, Leman masterfully shares that a spouse comes into marriage with more baggage than they realize. In other words, the husband and the wife bring ideas (good or bad), experiences (good or bad), and theology (good or bad) into the marriage bed that WILL guide their relationship including the sexual relationship they have. It is a MUST read and a chapter in which I underlined, marked up, and made many comments.

I could go on and on and on about this book and its contents. The chapters for “Men Only” and for “Women Only” were fascinating and quite helpful. Both my wife and I have been helped by this book and will use it to help many other couples. If you are married, get this book, read it and allow it to help you have a more satisfying intimate life with the spouse God gave you.

Happy reading!

Book Review: Preaching That Pleases God by Tom Farrell

preachingI started reading this book the third week of September 2014 – the same week I attended a “Preach the Word” conference in Baltimore, Maryland. That conference, along with this book, has really challenged me concerning the preaching of the Word of God!

Outstanding, solid read! If I was teaching a college-level class on the subject of preaching, this would definitely make the list of textbooks for the students to read, study, and dissect.

It does not take long for one to realize that the author has done his homework concerning this book. Of course, his preaching ministry over the past thirty years only adds to his vast knowledge and wisdom concerning this topic. I love the humility of this author as he teaches all of the facets of preaching.

The material is very applicable but I also find it quite inspiring. Going back through the book, I found I had underlined over one-hundred sixty sentences, thoughts, or illustrations. The book has four parts:

1. The Commission for Preaching
2. The Comprehension of Preaching
3. The Construction of Preaching
4. The Communication of Preaching
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Book Review: Autopsy of a Deceased Church by Thom Rainer

autopsyAbsolutely loved the start to this book…what a powerful word picture the author uses to describe what the reader comes to know as a dying church!

You say, “Why in the world would I want to read about dying churches?” This book is not so much about dying churches, but observations from the “autopsies” of fourteen churches who had died. Rainer describes the thought of an autopsy as disconcerting and one that no one enjoys. However, in his introduction, he makes a very poignant statement. “The trauma of observing an autopsy is only beneficial if it is received as a warning to the living.” He then goes on to state that this book is not about dwelling on the past, but bearing fruit in the future.

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Book Review: Out of Commission by Paul Chappell

CommissionHaving read quite a few of Paul Chappell’s book, I believe this has been one of his finest. Some of his books are a bit dry, but I found this one to be a compelling, balanced approach to the subject of the Great Commission.

It is often that you find two camps pitted at opposite ends of the spectrum when it comes to the Great Commission. There are many churches who teach and preach and practice soul winning, soul winning, soul winning but do a poor job of discipleship (which is just as much a part of the Great Commission). At the other end are churches who are excellent at the discipleship piece of the Great Commission but are not reaching anyone with their evangelistic or soul winning efforts because they basically are not pursuing souls. This book is call for a balanced approach.

Chappell has done a superb job writing a Biblically sound book filled with philosophy and practicality concerning the Great Commission. And from what I can tell, he and his church successfully practice what he teaches in the book. It is no wonder that his church is a very solid, growing (quite young still), balanced work.

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Pouring on Guilt? Or Administering Mercy?

Guilt

“You shouldn’t have done that…”, “If only you hadn’t cut it…”, “Of all the things you could have done, that was the worst…”, “I just can’t believe you did that…”

All of the above statements and more were made to me recently. The person speaking to me was our landlord. Currently, we are renting a house and I made a mistake. You see, the kitchen floor is covered in linoleum. It is in good condition. However, during the winter months, the edges started curling up under the cabinets and were covering the main heater vent in the kitchen. Being the consummate handyman that I am and not wanting to bother the landlord, I decided to “trim” back the linoleum. Unfortunately, I cut about three inches off of the linoleum and then stapled down the edges with a staple gun (I kid you not). Over the next couple of months, the linoleum started coming up and occasionally bits of food would fall under the flooring. Our dogs, with their finely tuned dog noses, sniffed out the food and would try to retrieve the food by clawing the linoleum. Needless to say, the edges of our linoleum are ripped in various spots and the whole thing looks like a disaster.

Back to the quoted statements…those were a few of the things that the landlord said to me when I explained to him over the phone the situation. Now, I can understand his frustration. Here he is managing many different homes and there are people like me (Tim the tool-man Taylor) trying to “help him out” by fixing things myself. I can understand his frustration. However, I do not understand why he continued to berate me over and over again on the telephone concerning the issue. I believe I counted ten different times he told me in no uncertain terms that I blew it, I made a huge mistake, this could have been fixed if I would have called him initially. I told him that I had good intentions and was trying to keep from having him employ someone to fix the situation. He put me down again and I finally interrupted him and said out loud, “I MADE A MISTAKE, I SHOULD NOT HAVE DONE WHAT I DID!”

Continue reading “Pouring on Guilt? Or Administering Mercy?”